A Dummy’s Guide to Danger #4

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Oct 2006 | Viper Comics

Writing: Jason M. Burns
Art: Ron Chan
Letters: Greg Gatlin

Terri’s alive and only had her kidney removed then Mr. Boyd comes along with some more of his bad cop gibberish, but might start changing his tune when the real killer almost shoots him. blah blah blah blah stuff happens, case closed.

The final issue of this series couldn’t come any sooner. I can finally be done with this annoying story. I’ve said this before, I hate Boyd’s bad cop routine. HATE it.

Of course we have the typical standoff between the killer and detective, and of course, the gun gets away from him and he has to go yelling at Bloomberg to get it. I know he’s crazy, but it’s gotten old. What I thought was so wonderful has become annoying and stupid with a predictable plot.

Finally over.

A Dummy’s Guide to Danger #3

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Sep 2006 | Viper Comics

Writing: Jason M. Burns
Art: Ron Chan
Letters: Greg Gatlin

Our private eyes managed to deal with the issue involving the police, get themselves home, and have a nice visit from their serial killer.

This guy’s mental state is wonderful, and painfully annoying. So he’s got the Flesh Collecter in his apartment, he’s got a gun, but it’s not loaded because Mr. Bloomberg didn’t load it. He’s an F’ing dummy, you dolt! Of course it’s not loaded! Get yourself some help, you’re starting to irritate me!*sigh*And despite having his ear cut off, he asks that stupid dummy to load all his guns. You’d think after this incident, he’d have enough sense to do it himself.

There’s another golden moment in here when he’s still being held at the station. Two thugs beat the crap out of him and we see the scene where Mr. Bloomberg gets shot and is told the devastating news about his spinal cord injury. The whole scene, that dummy is running around on his own. It makes me wonder if that’s what his mind actually sees when he looks at that dummy.

This issue was still a bit frustrating in the same manner as the last. I really don’t like crime mysteries like this. They always end up being a rehash of something else and I’m still sick of the bad police bit.

The only satisfaction I got from this book was when Alan punched that old police guy in the jaw, knocking him flat.

One more issue to got and this case is closed.

A Dummy’s Guide to Danger #2

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Aug 2006 | Viper Comics

Writing: Jason M. Burns
Art: Ron Chan
Letters: Greg Gatlin

Last issue, a headless corpse of a famous actress wound up driving through the wall of their office.

Now the body of a platinum selling pop idol is pinned to a wall in her house and the killer’s gunning for him.

I don’t know how many times I’ve seen the detective-arrives-at-crime-scene-before-police-and-becomes-instant-suspect routine. It’s way old, and I’m sick of it. I’m sick of big bad police department ego vs. the hero’s ego. I’m equally sick of the battles of wit the confrontations spawn. They make my blood boil at how stupid both sides are behaving and how easily the entire conflict could be avoided and we can move on. Sure, I suppose it makes for a great story, the first few times. It’s so overplayed, you can’t read the suit of the card anymore.

It’s this reason I really hated this issue. I can’t say for sure I know what’s going to happen, but I’m already starting to feel the disappointment set in from using such an overdone hook. If not for Mr. Bloomberg and our crazy PI, I’d abandon this without a second thought.

A Dummy’s Guide to Danger #1

Jul 2006 | Viper Comics

Writing: Jason M. Burns
Art: Ron Chan
Letters: Greg Gatlin

I guess I deserved it when I asked my comic man for something weird the last time I hit up my LCS. I don’t ask for recommendations often, but the rare times I have, he hasn’t steered me wrong. I was in an odd mood that day and it wasn’t that I was really seeking a recommendation as I was putting him to the test.

“How about a mystery.” He said and pulled four issues, placing them in my uncertain hands. “A Dummy’s Guide to Danger” I read and glanced over the covers that had this detective pulp style to them that intrigued me along with the other text gracing the cover.

Murder!
Intrigue!
Ventriloquist puppets!

I knew I wasn’t going to get anymore out of him. I simply had to put my faith in him once more and just bite the bullet. And now, I just don’t understand how I could have missed it to begin with. This has got to be one of the most unique mysteries I have ever read, and I’m mostly addressing the main character(s) and their very concept.

Alan Sirois is a private eye with a very special partner, Mr. Bloomberg. Mr. Bloomberg is actually a dummy. I’m not talking as in stupid. I mean in the ventriloquist puppet sense. He is a dummy and Alan actually believes he’s paraplegic from suffering a bullet to the spine. He is by no means aware that Mr. Bloomberg is a doll.

Together, the two of them solve mysteries and this latest one involves a murderer known as the Flesh Collector.

It’s the first few pages that sealed the deal. A young, obese man is being roughed up and interrogated regarding a little girl. As the scene reaches it’s climax, we see a nicely dressed dummy sitting on a high stool and we realise who’s been doing the talking all this time. It sent shivers down my spine. I thought to myself, “how wonderful! This private dick is completely nuts.” I also began wondering what other wonderful issues lurk in his psyche and how long it would take to find out.

The art is special in it’s un-special way. Something about it, especially how Mr. Bloomberg is drawn, really creeps me the Hell out. I don’t think I’d like it outside of this comic, but this is really working out well with this story.

The next scene that stood out was the conversation about the wheelchair between Alan and his partner. You get a real sense of just how messed up that guy is and how convinced he is of that dummy being real. It’s a doll. They don’t look real at all, they’re really creepy (Dead Silence really messed me up and thanks to that I hate all dummies and antiquated looking dolls), not to mention lack of all the fleshy bits and internals. He doesn’t even move his mouth when he talks, but this guy is still totally convinced he’s a real person and it’s captured so well with words.

Even when all Hell breaks loose and he’s arguing with his partner, it’s just so magical in a messed up sort of way. Not to mention the scene where he’s at dinner and actually calls his partner. My mind has troubles sometimes fathoming the extent of his madness and It’s so good. This is such an entertaining read.

This is showing some serious potential to make the spotlight list if the writing quality keeps up and the story delivers.

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